who needs an alarm clock...

....when your child gets up repeatedly at 5 am. Someone shoot me please. Every day, no I take that back, every day except for last Wednesday, she has gotten up at 5 or 5:30, which I think is pretty inconsiderate since she obviously is not taking mommy's sleep into consideration. I wake up to "Mommy, Mommy, up, juice, Mommy, Mooooooommmyyyyyyyy, up!" I tell you , someone or something is going to get hurt real soon. I DO NOT know what in the hell is up with her. She is on me like white on rice. I love her and I would never trade her for the world, but seriously, Mommy's breaks are needing to come a lot closer together....and she will not stay with her Daddy for more than 30 minutes unless I am just not there. I can forget trying to take a nap. I just have to walk around in a daze for the rest of the day or doze off when she isn't looking. I know these are the precious times, but my arm hurts from holding her alllllllll the friggin' time and my eyes hurt from not getting enough sleep and my head hurts from all the screaming and crying. I just don't know what to do!!! I feel like such an inadequate mother. I find myself yelling at her and begging her to stop crying.....lawd, I know why there is shaken baby syndrome.... I threaten her with time out...which, believe it or not that is actually working with the crying. Anyway, I know most of you moms have gone through this so if you have any words of encouragement, shoot me an e-mail....or hell, just shoot me. Take your pick. Being a good mother is so hard!

Just to let you know how shot my left arm is....I was walking back to work with my lunch, in a plastic bag, and was carrying a coke in the same hand and my arm starting shaking and about gave out.....my muscles are shot on that side. I was talking to my neighbor the other day and I told her that I can truly understand mothers that say they can't put their infants down because all they do is cry, because I have that in a 23 lb. toddler. I understand now and will never judge another mom that says that again.